Category Archives: From Random Acts Of Reality

From my old blog, Random Acts of Reality

Well, I’ll Start Off With A Basic One, I Hate Spam.

Simple really, and hardly controversial, except that I live in England and really couldn't care less about showing “pride in my nation” by flying an American flag. Nor do I really care to see “singles in my area” when my area isn't actually Wisconsin.
I started using the Internet many years ago…So many I can't remember, but it was with the Lynx text based browser, Babylon 5 was just starting and no-one warned you about putting your email address in your Newsgroup postings.

Therefore I have about 180 Spam messages a day cluttering up my Inbox, which makes my ability to pick up Email over my Mobile phone pointless, because I spend 36p/min downloading penis extension programmes.

(For the record, I'm more than happy with my penis and it's length, it does it's job, which is to give pleasure…to me at least)

It is the impotence (try www.curemyflacidwilly.com) in which I have no power to seek revenge for these transatlantic scrotes (for it is hard to firebomb an office halfway across the world) which is the main source of my anger…

…So a question to any American who is reading this…When they have a Toll-free number listed…

(a) Does the company pay the phone bill?

(b) How much will it cost them if I ring them from the UK and then leave my phone off the hook?

If the answer to these questions are respectively “Yes” and “Quite a lot” then I may have formed a new line of revenge. Of course I doubt it's that simple.

But I live in hope.