Blimey, who turned up the thermostat and humidity in England while I was gone?
I spent a whole week without internet access, stuck in the middle of nowhere. It was so far from anywhere of any interest that I wouldn't have been surprised to trip over a blonde farm-boy with a lightsaber looking to get out of his humdrum existence. One internet café seen, if only in passing, very few English newspapers, and a TV whose only English channel was some 24 hour business channel. I managed to finish reading some books that I had been putting off for a quiet moment – and this holiday was one very long quiet moment.
It felt as if I had travelled back in time to the 1980's, there was pitiful mobile/GPRS coverage – so much so that I could only get a signal at sunset – and that was everywhere I went on the island. The music that was being piped out of shops and coaches was of the Phil Collins/Chris Rea/80's soft rock movement.
But the thing that made me think I was in the 80's was the design of the advertisements. Billboards with the faces of people who look rather uncannily like a (pre-capture) Saddam Hussein, pictures of bad drawings of buildings. Big red stars with whatever the Spanish equivalent of “Sale!” or “50%! Off! Now!”. It is a sad state of affairs when you start looking for more and more tacky advertisements for entertainment and for some form of cultural “zero-point”.
Some things that I did learn on holiday, taking a laptop is well worth its weight, especially when said laptop is loaded with films. Seeing a 'Marineland' show taught me that Dolphins and sea-lions are smarter than me, because I can't balance a ball on my nose, and that although being a dolphin trainer must be one of the best jobs in the world, they still have to rake the dolphin shit from the bottom of the pool.
Also after a trip to 'Green Planet' zoo, I've discovered that Raccoons are the cutest animals in existence – can we have some released into the wilds of England please…
To get vaguely on-topic, Spanish ambulances are tiny, I couldn't stand up in one…
I was exceptionally happy to fly back into England, catch the last train home and in a fit of rather sad geek-dom, post that I had returned. What can I say – I was itching to get my keyboard under my fingers. For the rest of today (after unpacking my bags) I shall be catching up on all those links on the left of the screen. Understand my journey – click on them all yourself and spread the love of a visit.