Take off your shoe.
Now remove your sock/stocking.
Get a ballpoint pen (red for added authenticity)
Lightly touch the nib of the pen against the sole of your foot.
You are now looking at the same wound that I went to last night. As a Category A call.
The patient was a 25 year old woman who had stood on a sliver of glass. The pain was apparently so bad that not only couldn’t she walk, but the pain was travelling up her leg and into her chest.
Chest pain = Category A call.
I had to wheel her out of her expensive riverside
Her husband told us that he would follow behind us in his car.
The only sound you could hear while she was being wheeled out was Reynolds grinding his teeth.
After she was safely dropped off at hospital I indulged in a little ‘Primal scream’ therapy.
I’m starting to come around to the idea of charging for certain ambulance jobs…