(Another) Nan Down

Since I am feeling (and to be more honest looking) fat I’ve decided to take up cycling again.  I’m sure that I gave a great amount of joy to anyone who saw this particular tubby man puffing and panting against the wind while cycling along at 1mph.  Still, if I want to stop from looking 6 months pregnant I need to start some exercise.  This is due, in part, to a job I did yesterday.

We were sent to a strange call.  It was given as “Elderly woman laying on the green as you enter Kellett road.  Woman may have got up”.

Rushing to the green we found it empty.  So we decamped from the ambulance, grabbed our bags and went for a little wander to see if the patient was hiding in a dip in the ground.  Across the green, near some houses, some people started waving at us, so we trotted over.

The patient was a very elderly woman.  She was wearing a nightdress, a threadworn cardigan and nothing on her legs.  She was also barefoot – I was surprised that the thin skin on her feet hadn’t been torn apart by the pavement.

The temperature, not taking into account the strong windchill factor, was around 1 degree Celsius.

She was – unsurprisingly – a bit blue and she felt like a block of ice.

We just had our medical equipment with us, we didn’t have a blanket, so I took off my fleece and wrapped it around her before running back to the ambulance to bring it closer to the patient.

Twenty-four hours later and my ankles are still in pain.  I was shocked by how out of breath I was after jogging about 150 yards.

I brought the ambulance closer and we bundled the patient into the back, turned the heating on full and wrapped her in our blankets.  The patient was one of those little old ladies that you would want to give a good cuddle to if she were your Gran.  We had a short and uneventful trip to the hospital where she was soon receiving the attention of the nursing staff.

My crewmate filled in a ‘vulnerable adult’ form, which means that the Social Services will get involved so that the patient will (hopefully) get any long-term care that she needs.

I managed to get my fleece back.

It now smells of granny wee.

It’s in the washing machine as I type this.

19 thoughts on “(Another) Nan Down”

  1. Aw, I have just found your blog, and reading through it reminds me of all the good times I had as an A & E nurse, before I became a dreaded NHS manager! It was wonderful.

  2. I just gave my bike to my little sister (part of accepting that it's not like I'm going to be able to use it again). But it's surprising how easy it is to keep your weight and shape more or less under control just by not eating vast amounts of crap, and by doing teeny-weeny low-impact exercises little and often.My physiotherapist gave me a bit of this stuff called Thera-Band, see if you can nick a bit – basically it's stretchy stuff you play with to do resistance exercises, tie a loop of it to the desk or bed or whatever and that's fun. Then there's all sorts of posture stuff and stretches that help.

    OK so it doesn't feel as active as when I used to cycle or rollerskate or dance, but I've been basically sat on my arse doing a grand total of buggerall for over a year now and I'm still wearing the same size clothes.

  3. My Fleece regularly smells of old lady wee. its amazing they dont wee themselves, or excrete any mosture while theyre wrapped in ur fleece and yet it always comes back stinking.It is always the same though, cold old lady and no blanket!

  4. 'Tie a loop of it to the bed and that's fun'?

    So I can get this stuff from shops with blacked out windows?

    I think I'll stick to the rowing machine I'm stealing off my brother.

  5. well, I think you can order it online too, and they'd probably deliver it in a plain package.I loved my physio sessions – an incredibly attractive man in his late twenties telling me to get on all fours on the bed and so on…

    *reminisces*

    generally I considered a session to be a success if I could make him stammer, giggle or have a choking fit.

  6. Ah old lady wee. That unique smweel that is impossible to get rid of for the rest of a shift wihout washing your entire uniform.

  7. Ah old lady wee. That unique smell that is impossible to get rid of for the rest of a shift wihout washing your entire uniform.

  8. I dread to think the ammounts of bodily fluids I have on my nursing uniform today…Their are possibilities of:

    Granny wee (obviously)

    IV Drug user blood (which I mopped up)

    a Dead bodies blood (which splashed everywhere… I had a apron but still)

    clostridium difficile diarrhea (again aprons dont protect the whole body)

    Then there are the copious ammounts of “clean” but smelly fluids which some nurses take pride in splashing on me, Antibiotics when being 'drawn up' are a fav.

  9. I'm having a hard time understanding how you manage to lack exercise, racing around in an ambulance and lifting people several times a day. Even etiolated grannies are no light weight. Nor do you strike me as a shirker who lets his partner do all the work while he sips tea and eats sweets. Explain, please.

  10. *googles* yep, them's the bunnies.Except my theraband is yellow (the weakest and most pathetic level) and the other varieties were purple, green, red, blue, which sounds nicer than pink and grey if I'm honest.

    Torture? Only if you get inventive… I kept getting told “stop if it hurts, the aim of this isn't to hurt, just to keep you in shape”.

  11. my money is on the hastily gobbled fast-food eaten on shift.Someone pack this man a nutritious lunchbox!

  12. Ha. Just pictures, as cited above. Gives me nightmares, and I don't bike anymore. My spouse did shatter his elbow falling off his bike (stupid little kid cut him off. Kid wasn't hurt at all. )

  13. You won't regret cycling around London – it's huge fun once you discover that not _everyone_ is out to kill you.I can't say it's made me able to run anywhere without getting out of breath though. I can happily cycle 120 miles, but run about 12 yards – probably different muscles.

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