For the past five nights the majority of my patients have been sick with one or more of the following…

  • High temperature.
  • Runny nose.
  • Vomiting.
  • Night sweats.
  • Lethargy.
  • Cough.
  • ‘Generally unwell’.

So there must be at least one highly infectious disease epidemic in the area, while you or I might want to curl up in bed with some Lemsip and paracetamol, it would seem that a large number of Newham would rather sit in an A&E waiting room.


Which leads me to the point of this post.  Us ambulance crews spend a lot of time around these infectious patients, patients who have often never been taught the good manners of putting their hand over their mouth when they cough.

So is it any wonder that I’ve got painful eyes, a streaming nose, a constant mild headache and a feeling that I’m suffering from a mild hangover.


Us ambulance crews mustn’t have more than three periods of sick in an eighteen month period.

So I’m having to drag my potentially infectious body into work – where maybe I can infect some more people…

So in conclusion.

Send me nurses – pretty female nurses with plenty of drugs.*



*With apologies to another writer/blogger who also asks for nurses and never seems happy when I mention my previous career.

11 thoughts on “Bleurgh”

  1. You would have thought that your line of work would give you a better immune system. Living in halls of residence, and being in the general proximity of several thousand of them means that I hardly ever get anything infectious. We have mumps, D&V and cold/flu on a regular basis here, and I never seem to get any of them!

  2. My housemate is complaining of being ill at the moment.I committed the cardinal sin last night of commenting “I'm doing really well, not had a single cold all winter”.

    Wake up this morning with headache, sore throat and blocked up nose.

    Damn viruses.

  3. After attending several d+v cases over last weekend, i woke up on monday morning with a very sudden desire to vomit and an equal desire to……… you can guess the rest! This resulted in two days off work and up to my sick limit, and the medic application has just gone in…… you applying tom?

  4. I got that last week, it really wasn't pleasant. especially since i managed to projectile vomit over my stairs and bathroom door.

  5. Tom,Heard the arguement a million times and it does have some merit, however isn't it odd that the harder working, more committed members of staff, see more of these sickly patients and yet spend less time sick.

    Good luck with the application.


  6. crickey- 3 sick periods in eighteen months???!! How many sick days are you entitled to in a year (we get 10 in MAS in years 1 and 2 which increases to 15 after that and is cumulative)

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