These are my links for October 31st:

• Man on sex register for having a wank – Man, in his own bedroom, with a locked door is interrupted while having wank (with a bike, strange, but who cares) and is now on the sex offenders register. I always thought that what went on in your own bedroom was your own concern. Apparently not.
• BBC NEWS | England | Hampshire | Christmas tinsel ban at hospital – Tinsel causes MRSA! Of all the fomites I can think of, tinsel comes pretty low on the list. I reckon that the panto cast and singers are more of a risk…
• BBC NEWS | Education | Brown threatens failing schools – Close ‘failing’ schools? Then where will the ‘failing’ children go? Into other schools causing more overcrowding than there is at present.