Let You Entertain Me

I'm off working on nightshifts for the next few nights, and so will be spending large chunks of my time either asleep, working towards trying to be asleep, or desperately attempting to be awake while dealing with drunken teenagers.

So, for the next three days I'm opening up this blog for you dear reader. Comment authentication is off and anonymous comments are now allowed. This is the equivalent of letting down the castle gates while marauding barbarians look for decent women in medieval skirts.

Three days to entertain me and the other readers of this site.

Leave interesting stuff in the comments. Jokes, pictures, videos, short stories, links to interesting sites, links to your own sites. It's a free-for all for the next three days.

Show me amazing things, or work that you are proud of. Drop in links to whatever music you find interesting or forums that you call home.

Teach me something I don't know, or just plain show off your own particular talent. Tell me what is heading the news in your part of the word or leave me a video message.

30,000 people or so read this blog and each of you are unique in your own way – show me how much of a snowflake you are.

And a very grateful thank you to the person who sent me a gift from my Amazon Wishlist – it's very much appreciated and will see plenty of use, I'm a big fan. And this is the only way I can say thank you as you didn't give me your name.

61 thoughts on “Let You Entertain Me”

  1. “Links to your own stuff”? Ask and you shall receive! I've been doing a daily photo blog since January 1st 2007. Every single photo has been taken on a mobile phone, with no post-processing whatsoever.Go take a look: beoko365

    And for entertainment, I'd like to introduce you to the fabulous Oompah Brass

  2. An opportunity for shameless self-promotion? How can I resist?I'm a hospital porter. Help me give up this crappy job by reading my graphic novel, Damnation It's a science fiction / detective story, and I should probably warn prospective readers that there's violence, drugs, and very naughty language.

    Oh yeah, hi Tom!

  3. What nice, creative ideas you have ! Hope all people respond in the spirit you intend, and that you get decent sleep.Having recently had a minor, but at the time potentially unlimited experience as a customer of the Emergency Medical Service in Skokie, Illinois where this Londoner lives, I appreciate even more so your contributions.

    I also respect even more how hard you and many of your single and 2-crew colleagues must work at real jobs> While cycling to work I was 'simply' knocked down by a car driven by a man who told the Police Officer he had looked to the R. but not to the L., and as he drove on after stopping at the STOP sign he admitted responsibility.

    Ambulance responded supported by Fire Truck, providing lots of hands to assess, collar and secure me on a board. (How do you manage when there are only 2 of you ??)

    I was very lucky – the driver did stop, and remained on scene – the vehicle was a Honda Accord, a 'normal' car and not a SUV & I must have hit the bonnet/hood & been flung to the side, as otherwise I would likely have been under the vehicle and hence unable to write.

    My cycle helmet absorbed impact and split and cracked. The split resulted in a gash on my scalp (dramatic, continuing bleeding) and I had road rash/rage in various places but no other significant injuries.

    I gather that here in the US, it is often routine for fire truck to respond with ambulance, so that there are more skilled crew members who can assist with the many items of medical gear needed and the removal of patient.

    Thanks to you all. / david b

  4. Since there's no success like excess, here are 10 things that amuse/interest me, in no particular order:1) The Little Red Monkey video gets me every time.

    2) I once entered a campus version of the Gong Show by solving a Rubik's Cube to the tune of Sabre Dance.

    3) My favorite underappreciated webcomic: Kawaii Not

    4) I'm learning to play roller derby. It's like combining wrestling, hockey, and a lot of attitude, all on 8 wheels. I love it.

    5) The first time I saw a picture of Alan Moore, I thought someone had played a prank on him and replaced his picture with one of the Unabomber.

    6) I just heard a new song called Rehab Girl by The Bleeding Hearts. I highly recommend finding their Myspace page and listening to it.

    7) I want to be Madeline Kahn when I grow up. Yes, I realize I am technically grown up and that she's deceased. Don't care.

    8) If you've never played Katamari Damacy, you're missing out.

    9) I love reading medblogs because I think they have the best stories about humanity.

    10) Shameless self-promotion!

  5. Hi TomI'm hooked on your blog because you are so far removed from me that the interest factor is off the scale.

    I don't live in the UK, I don't think I've ever been in an ambulance and I can only guess at your mental state day in/day out.

    Yet your writing tells me in great detail what your life is like, what troubles you, even what you crave.

    Seems you're not so different from the rest of us in a lot of ways, with particular emphasis on decent, compassionate, humane…..

    Your writing is compelling, please keep at it.

    Self-promotion – Off.

  6. Just a Thanks for a fantastic blog to read. Dealing with some not fun shifts myself and one day off in 2 weeks of night day and double shift mixes. Roll on Monday morning 4 days of bed. Nothing much interesting other wise l am off to work did a 17 hr shift yesterday and about to go off on an 8hr one.I was that tired the other day l sat down by accident on the sharp end of a dental scaler when setting up for a dental and all l did way scream, cuss and still it didn't wake me up.

    What l want is a lottery win, the trouble is l keep forgetting to buy a ticket.

  7. Hi Tom, hope you manage to get some sleep over the next few days! If you feel your mood slipping take a look at http://www.ukuleleorchestra.com .. yes ukulele orchestra! A friend put me on to them and I've since seen them live, they are the funniest cleverest muso's I've seen in a long time and never fail to raise my spirits… (there are clips on Youtube as always… Life on Mars and Smells like Teen spirit are my favourites)….enjoy!


  8. Wow, unfettered comments – bravery indeed!I thought everything in moderation was meant to be good for you, no moderation sounds more like me, who's already chosen “Sophisticated Lady” for the funeral (hopefully not for a while yet,though).

    Anyway, methinks you already know that you're my favourite blog but thought I'd share my close second with you :



  9. Long time lurker, first time poster as they say …Since you ask, here's a blatent plug for my travelling blog http://travellingphilbury.blogspot.com or rather, wandering around the UK 'cos I'm too lazy/disorganised to get off these shores.

    I'm sure there is potential for a load more of this. Your recent post about holidays and wondering where to go made me think that the world needs more tools to help pick locations. Not the obvious ones but places to go that will provide a days entertainment. Since I prefer to travel by train, can I put out an appeal for someone to produce a tool that allows the user to input a price and start point and gives opitons for how far you can travel for the money ?

    Sorry there's nothing medical in here – the nearest I get to this is giving blood and that's hardly exciting. Nice biscuits though…


  10. Long time lurker, first time poster as they say …Since you ask, here's a blatent plug for my travelling blog http://travellingphilbury.blogspot.com or rather, wandering around the UK 'cos I'm too lazy/disorganised to get off these shores.

    I'm sure there is potential for a load more of this. Your recent post about holidays and wondering where to go made me think that the world needs more tools to help pick locations. Not the obvious ones but places to go that will provide a days entertainment. Since I prefer to travel by train, can I put out an appeal for someone to produce a tool that allows the user to input a price and start point and gives opitons for how far you can travel for the money ?

    Sorry there's nothing medical in here – the nearest I get to this is giving blood and that's hardly exciting. Nice biscuits though…


  11. Hello,I'm a Brit living in Belgium. I love your blog and have been reading it for ages. I really admire you. It takes courage to do your job, but it also takes lots of courage to share your thoughts and experiences with all of us. Thank you!

    I don't have anything particularly exciting to share, but it is my birthday today so I'll send everyone reading this a big hug.


  12. Tom,Its my last day at work before starting full time as a tech. I've been reading your blog for 4 years now and its been a great help and inspiring. Just wanted to say thanks for the insight and keep the faith!

    Can't wait for your next book.

    All the best

  13. Well I have never been a “client” of any ambulance service….yet.So roll out the bad jokes…

    George Bush is visiting a school and asks the children “What is a tragedy?” . So on child puts his had up and says “Well, what if a tree fell on the school, and, like, killed everyone?” “No sir, that would be a accident” “Well what if like a plane crashed into the Senate and killed ,like, everyone? “No sir that would be a great loss” “Ok..well… what if you and Laura were flying in Air Force One and got shot down? “And how do you know that it would be a tragedy?” “Well Mr Bush.. it wouldn't be a great loss and probably not an accident either.

  14. Probably the same as 500 other people by now: long-time lurker!Enjoy the nightshifts…and when you've finished them, I'm sure between us all we'll have given you some reading material.

    Self promotion bit: http://londonstuff.blogspot.com

    All the best,

    Michael 🙂

  15. Uh, okay… I'm Mary, I've been reading and commenting on here for some years… I do have my own blog but it hasn't been updated in a couple of weeks – a combination of me having a bit of a bad phase, and lots of other business to attend to (job applications, social services, a trip back home, other people's weddings, etc) which gets higher precedence for my spoons than blogging does. I will be blogging again just as soon as the gorilla lets me.Meanwhile I am also knitting leaves out of pandas.

  16. Hello honey,it's strange, I've been reading this blog for 2 or three years and don't think I've ever left a comment before.

    You, good sir, have seen me through countless hours of paralysing temp jobs and I thank you from the bottom of my bottom. I've also been living in bow and working around there/stratford/walthamstow for years and it makes reading your blog all the more excellent (I too am forced to endure the 'excellence' of the Royal London on an occasional basis. *sigh*)

    What follows is my current favourite (non-filthy) joke. For some reason it's more satisfying if you imagine the father as having a stern scots accent. I don't know why that might be.

    One night, little inflatable boy found that he could not go to sleep, not even with his little inflatable teddy, not even with the light on. So he crept from his room into his inflatable parents' bedroom and tried to squeeze into their bed with them.

    Ever so quietly he crept, ever so gently he lifted the sheets, but try as he might he could not squeeze into the bed with them, there simply wasn't room.

    Suddenly little inflatable boy had a marvellous idea. He reached over and, very carefully, opened his air valve and let some air escape from it. Then he gently did the same to his inflatable mum, and crept carefully around to repeat the process with his inflatable dad.

    This done, little inflatable boy found that there was just the right amount of space in his inflatable parents bed for a little inflatable boy to crawl in, curl up and go to sleep, and sleep he did.

    When little inflatable boy awoke in the morning, he opened his eyes to see the face of his inflatable dad, creased with anger standing over him still in his inflatable parent's bed. His father pointed at him and said,

    “Son, you've let me down, you've let your mother down, and worst of all, you've let yourself down”.


    That replaced the former contents of that slot in my head that is filled with the joke you tell when someone says “go on, tell us a joke!” and you can't remember anything else.

    The former occupat of this slot went:

    “what do you call a hippoptamus with a machine gun?”


    I like to think the little inflatable boy joke is an improvement.

    Good luck with the nights, dude. I'll miss you, but then I always do.

  17. Greetings from across the Pond! It's great(?) to see we both face the same issues of mismanagement, poor systems, and an undereducated public thinking that we do this for free and have no problems with stubbed toes at 3am.Not a self-promotion kinda guy, so i'll promote a EMT/Firefighter from Northern Wisconsin who weaves a nice little memoir about small town EMS: Mike Perry, (http://www.sneezingcow.com) and his most 'famous' work, Population 485: Meeting You Neighbors One Siren at a Time.

    Thanks much for the interesting read!


  18. I read your blog most days…its a good way to start the morning. I love your out look on life.I haven't bought the book yet but I have read it. Most amusing.

    Keep it up.

    For entertainment check out the Red hot chilli pipers – on the utube. Very talented and entertaining.

    Thank you for making the days more interesting.


  19. I thought my joke was very good. And I have posted quite a few times before.Not going to self-promote, but I strongly suggest getting the DVD of “Son of Rambow” Excellently funny film, set where I used to live.

  20. After 6 years of working for a tech company in America, they are fulfilling my master plan of moving me to the EU to help start a team in Amsterdam. This means I may actually get a chance to visit London and have some horrendous injury that may end up on a blog I read regularly!

  21. I work in the Estates department of a very large Liverpool hospital. Rhymes with “boil”. If any nurses, ward managers etc who phone me to report jobs are reading: STOP LYING TO ME.Had main theatres call me the other day and report a theatre out of operation (sorry) so I sent an engineer that very minute.Poor sod got up there, got scrubbed in, got changed into the gear, walked into theatre 2. Someone getting their hip fixed.Nice one. You're main theatres. I'm ALWAYS gonna make you top of the list. Well, until now, that is.Oh, and don't tell me a job is urgent, tell me why it's urgent. I'll decide for myself. Tell me: the cat scanner cooler is icing up, someone's stuck in a lift and a light is out in your corridor. Which do you think I'm sending the electrician to first, second and third? And if you tell me the light is urgent, who do you think I'm sending the electrician to first?Don't ask about: microwaves, toasters, non-medical fridges and the heating in physio reception.Feel a bit better now.Incidentally, I'm a temp, I finish in 2 weeks and am looking forward to my last day when I will say the word “fuck” more than the word “estates”. I like ambulance workers. They never phone me AT ALL.

  22. I've been reading this 'ere blog for a couple of years. i'm a 56 year old fat woman,married to a retired GP (I was his practice nurse and we retired at the same time.) We have two daughters, our eldest is just about to start a paramedic degree course and our youngest has decided to change from film studies to international relations at university.I have Tom to thank for Twitter.com where I post as vivdora, (he mentioned it when it first started).

    We have two cats, two ponies and a dog.

    I have a blog it's vivdora.wordpress.com, recently I have been writing about being a student nurse in the 70's and I plan to write more about that, albeit slowly.

    What do you call a man who used to like tractors?

    An extractor fan.

    If i was any good at linking I'd show you photos of the animals, I've started top post them at vivdora.com . Thanks to Tom for this idea.

  23. I've been writing a blog for a couple of months. I was inspired to do it after meeting Stu from Paramedics Diary. Reading the latest updates by him and you are top of my things to do when I get into the office every morning! My blog is http://littlemissileostomy.blogspot.com If you drop by please leave a comment – I'll get everso excited if you do!And I might just take a wee clicky over on your Amazon wish list if you're very lucky!!

  24. This is definitely the the best suggestion – whoever you are, thank you for taking the time to pass this on. Very moving and stunning photography.

  25. Tom tom tom… can i just first say thanks… you got me thru a really tough uni project (at one point i was checking the blog 3-4 times a day to see if you had up dated)now to keep with the entertainment thing and knowing your probibly not a million miles diffrent to me (the whole RP games and WoWing) i felt you would enjoy this …

    http://www.lfgcomic.com/ not mine! i wish…

    but also seeing me and my larping buddies on TV…


    Self promotion… thats me at 12 seconds in!

  26. Good luck sorting through all this. So, here is my personal corner of the blogsphere, meandering writings, photos, drivel in general. Occasional rants about life in surgery.One Word

    A woman who blogs about her odd family, spouse, unusual daughter, two dogs. Lots of humor, with photos.


    An anthropomorphic artist with small things and wire.

    Bent Objects

    A webcomic for all geeks, and those who love them.


    And simple graphs to explain it all.


  27. Probably not amusing, but thought I would tell you a little bit about one of your readers. I live in South Dakota (USA) and I am a 911 dispatcher here. I absolutely love reading your blog – gives me a little more insight on what goes on at the other end of the phone call. I have a website, occasionally updated with funny/strange calls I take at http://www.xanga.com/klred if you would like to check it out. Nowhere near the amazing writing of yours, but hopefully will get better over time.

  28. After a problem at work the other night l now have to have a course of injections. What is it with human medical staff and HUGE needles.In my line of work we use 5/8 long needles you human medics seem to only use them if they are a minimum of 2inches long. We use the thinnest possible needle for the job in hand. Human medical staff uses the fattest.

  29. I wanted to thank the LAS for Monday. Notting Hill was a war zone for a while there and we St John volunteers worked shoulder to shoulder with LAS. What a great bunch of girls and boys. It got hairy there for a while and it was good to be with the professionals who treated us as equals.

  30. I'm Araldia, I have been reading your blog for about 4 years I think, and have never commented before.I follow you on twitter also, and recommend your blog to friends, family and students on a frequent basis. (Oh dear, reading that back makes me sound like an obsessive stalker type :S )I never manage to keep up blogs I start, so I have nothing to say apart from “Keep it up, you work so hard and do things I know I would not have the self restraint to deal with.”:D

  31. Another post telling you how great your blog is … You're blog's great! :o)If you're ever curious what it's like to have to use the ambulance service regularly (for real emergencies only, I stress!) then stick your head around the corner of my blog http://theanticsofabrittleasthmatic.blogspot.com (sorry, dunno how to do links on here) where I talk about my daily life as a brittle asthmatic … which is kind of given away by the name of the blog ;o)

    Keep blogging when you have time and energy :o)

  32. Let's see…….been reading this blog for a couple of years and this is my third comment. I'm a housewife and carer for my daughter. And I cook. A lot.http://lynnblog.praemedicatus.com/

    And, a prayer to help you when times get tough…….

    Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

    The courage to change the things I cannot accept,

    And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill today because they got on my nerves.

    And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today as they may be connected to the feet I have to kiss tomorrow.

    Help me always give 100% at work.

    12% on Monday,

    23% on Tuesday,

    40% on Wednesday,

    20% on Thursday

    and 5% on Friday

    And help me to remember.

    When Im having a bad day and it seems that people are trying to wind me up, it takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only four to extend my arm and smack someone in the mouth.!!!

  33. Self promotion woohoo!Firstly I am a blogger too; not a medical professional but on the other side of things (CF, double lung transplant recipient). http://www.pinkandsmiley.blogspot.com

    Secondly and far more importantly I would not be here if it wasn't for the gift of a complete stranger who'd taken 2 minutes to sign the organ donor register. Is this something you've (fellow readers) always meant to do but never got round to it? http://www.uktransplant.org.uk/register. I was told there was a 50% chance I'd die due to the shortage of donors so am now vice-chair of a charity: http://www.livelifethengivelife.co.uk to raise more awareness and hopefully chance the horrible statistics I was faced with.

    This is absolutely shameful self promotion – massive apologies. I've been reading your blog for years (although I'd have to skip some posts when I was very ill as it was a little too close to home) and think you are a fabulous and very honest writer.

    Oh and a nice random fact to make up for all the me, me, me: baby sloths are slow inept that they frequently grab their own limbs instead of branches and fall out of the tree.

    Always makes me smile….

  34. A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room,Waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.

    The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.

    'Breast-fed,' she replied.

    'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.

    She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.

    Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said,

    'No wonder this baby is underweight.

    You don't have any milk.'

    I know,' she said,

    'I'm his Grandma,

    But I'm glad I came.!'

  35. Hello! Been reading your blog for a long time (have also bought the book), but have never taken the plunge and commented … until now.I'd just like to point y'all in the direction of Baldy's Blog – Adrian Sudbury was a journalist in Huddersfield who became ill with leukaemia and wrote about his illness and the journey it took him on (all the way to the PM and Number 10!) in his blog. He had a bone marrow transplant which was successful in giving him an 18 month lifeline. Earlier this year he was told the illness was terminal and he would not survive for more than a few months.

    Adrian passed away on August 20th 2008.

    If there's anyone reading this who has never thought about giving blood and/or joining the bone marrow register then Adrian's blog will really make you think about doing so.

    And when you've thought about it, here's how to go and do it: Anthony Nolan Trust

    Thanks for reading, and thanks for the opportunity.



  36. Thank you for sharing. Heavy stuff for a Sunday morning surf however my father developed the same condition after he retired. How I would love to have images like these to look back on.At the time you are too busy dealing with the challenges and want to remember better times but today even those challenges were good times we just didn't realize that at the time.

  37. There are a few things I would like to do before I die. The first one is to have an official id-card from somewhere, with my picture and the name “Henry T Hamster” on it. Somehow, makers of id-cards don't find this funny. I would also like to help a helicopter land in snow. For those who don't know, they'll land anywhere, anytime without help. Except in snow. In snow they'll land nose-to-nose with you and you'll be standing in a total whiteout, and if you move they follow. I'm hoping for a chance this winter. I'd like to make a really bad joke at the airport security check, but I haven't got the guts. I also want to have a star of life-tattoo. I have decided to have one if I ever get to save someone's life again (we too have too many calls that are nonsens). Maybe now I've gone public, they will come true. And I don't know how to make links, but here's playing the Snuffle Bunny for you, Tom. Always makes me smile, silly rabbit

  38. Hi, going to join the blatant self promotion group – http://www.rustzeb.blogspot.com. My ramblings on life, living with chronic asthma and anything else that is in my head!.Have been reading your blog for some time now but have never posted. Just wanted to say a huge THANK YOU to you and all your colleagues all over the UK. I have the utmost admiration for you all, especially when you seem to be confronted with so many time wasters. I seriously can't understand why people call 999 for trivial ailments, maybe it is because I don't tend to call for you guys (nicknamed as the little green men) until I have gone a particuraly pretty shade of blue. I like to make sure I am not wasting your time – lol 🙂

    Enjoy your night shifts


    Mad Asthmatic

  39. By now I'm probably the hundreth person to say 'long-time lurker, first-time poster'. I meant to say it on Saturday, when I first read your post – but then my power supply blew up. There are some really interesting burn marks where it used to be (according to Hubby, who plays with computers for a living).Anypeg. You asked for jokes and songs and interesting things and people's websites (etc). So:

    What do you call a flock of birds that can fly in different formations?

    The Red Sparrows.

    Some time ago, I was inspired by you and Kal's (Trauma Queen) blogs to start my own. Shortly after I started, I stopped because the ambulance bit me – being on crutches, there wasn't really that much to write about. The blog has now been successfully resuscitated as I'm headed back to work. I'm really looking forward to going back, so that probably confirms that I'm insane (as in Heller's Catch 22).

    My interesting link is this. I wish my instructor had made it that interesting…

    And the song that's currently going round in my head has the lyric:

    “Starts in my toes, makes me crinkle my nose”

    I can't remember the artist/title/album it's from, mind…

    Anypeg, if you need me, I'll be lurking over here.


  40. Hi tom, you know me well enough to know that I'm not a snowflake, I'm just plain bonkers.Having been pointed in the direction of your blog I became hooked and started blogging myself. Three years later and I'm still going strong and you scared the shite out of me when you slept on my floor last year and I forgot you were there. Never have the words 'morning luv' been quite as terrifying when you forget there's a 6foot unshaven bloke kipping on your floor.

    Because of you I am still in medical school. For this I can never be thankful enough.

  41. Sitting in a plane was a bishop and a young priest. The bishop was doing The Times crossword.''Four letter word, exclusively female, ends un U-N-T,'' he mumbled.

    ''Aunt?'' suggested the young priest.

    ''Oh, yeah!'' said the bishop, ''Have you got an eraser?''

  42. This American said to me the other day, “you know, it's starting to feel like there are only two countries in the world: America, and The Rest Of The World.”I said, “that's completely true, actually. In fact, The Rest Of The World even has its own flag now. It's exactly the same as the American flag, except it's on fire.”

  43. Huzzah – I've been lurking for so long…Tom you are a blinking marvel! I have spent the last year reading your blog while doing my radio show. It helps fritter away the hours as I play the same songs in a slightly different order, then some travel, then a bit of chat. I'm on maternity leave now having had a baby so I've got time to play….Get a load of these crazy Japanese people at play: Health and safety anyone? http://www.leenks.com/link122662.html

    I've got a blog too if you wanna have a shuftie…..www.helenknott.co.uk

    Have fun!

  44. Huzzah – I've been lurking for so long…Tom you are a blinking marvel! I have spent the last year reading your blog while doing my radio show. It helps fritter away the hours as I play the same songs in a slightly different order, then some travel, then a bit of chat. I'm on maternity leave now having had a baby so I've got time to play….Get a load of these crazy Japanese people at play: Health and safety anyone? http://www.leenks.com/link122662.html

    I've got a blog too if you wanna have a shuftie…..www.helenknott.co.uk

    Have fun!

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